ON THE RANCH 523 September 7 2007

Blackout!

It was a frightfully hot day, with only a slight breeze and a houseful of guests from England, Hawai’i and Nevada. You see, this past weekend my dearest husband and my wonderful office manager had planned a several day extravaganza celebration of my birthday. It was a significant one, a decade somewhere between 30 and 100. Friends and relatives started miraculously appearing everywhere I went- out for dinner (at a table for two) my family from England was suddenly standing on the porch of Grappolo’s. How did you get here, I asked, in shock at seeing them in Santa Ynez? My husband had said he was just out picking up a couple of things. I guess he was really picking up Bob and Jean from LAX by way of Litchfield, England and Paris! Then as we were lounging in the new pool the following afternoon with Pimm’s in hand, who should show up but Regan and Shoshanna, friends from Hawai’i. By the way, add one part Pimm’s to four parts lemonade and one lime, it has a little more zip than iced tea. El Rancho should be restocked with Pimm’s in about a week. It went on like this for the next few days with surprises too numerous to mention. As a person who generally knows all that goes on around here, it was truly a magnificent feat that my husband and company pulled this off. I wasn’t just surprised, I was in shock!

What a wonderful celebration with my nearest and dearest beside me, until the sublime went to awful. It was naturally the time that the toilet in one of the guestrooms would overflow requiring people to go outside the guest wing and go into the main house to use the facilities which, of course, got the dogs barking at all hours of the night. The ultimate disaster occurred when, as I emerged from my shower, hot and dripping, that I realized there was no electricity. I had 30 minutes to get ready to go somewhere, I didn’t know where or for what. I got dressed and did the best I could to look presentable in the half-dark. My husband tried, unsuccessfully, to get hold of our electrician to fix the problem, whatever it was. We left in a limo for an unknown destination.

 

When we returned later that evening to a dark house, it was clear that we were not going to have either lights or air-conditioning or even fans that evening. Fortunately, we had survived a week of no power or phones during El Nino so we were prepared with many flashlights and lanterns. We were also fortunate in that we had just, earlier that day, charged up some solar lanterns designed to light the way in the garden that we instead used to guide people around the house. They worked wonderfully.

 

The next morning, which was my actual birthday, we had another event to attend and we left the house, still no electricity, with the temperature, inside and out, climbing. During brunch, it was announced that it was between 107 to 109 degrees where we were. Dick Monoit, showed up and discovered that the source of the problem was not within the house but an outside 80-year-old transformer, but it did not affect our ranch office as the cat over there was quite comfortable. Our house guests tromped over to the office for hot showers as our hot water had become cold overnight. It was quite a sight seeing people coming up the road with towels and soap in their hands. I think it really frightened the turkeys that hang out around here!

 

To the rescue came the guys from PG&E to save the day! They promptly came out, determined what the problem was, got the correct crew assembled, and went to work replacing the ancient transformer, which had picked my birthday to sigh its last breath. At 5 p.m. the lights came back on and, in fairly quick succession, all of the other comfort items requiring electricity returned to normal and we concluded the day with a soak in the pool (now that we could open the powered cover!) with more cups of Pimm’s to salute the great guys from PG&E, who were willing, on a hot Sunday in September, to come out and help out a very grateful customer. I can only hope that I am as successful in scheduling an appointment to replace the even older transformer at the office before it blows and causes such a disruption!

 

Oh yes, and did I mention that when the toilets decided to malfunction, the three, count ‘em three, plungers we had simply vanished? We could not find a single one between the house and the office! And to top it all off as a weekend to remember, the coffee pot blew up on Monday! Can you believe it? Why does this kind of stuff NEVER happen when it’s just the immediate family? Can you tell me? I must say that all of our wonderful houseguests were very accommodating of all the adventures.

 

The Hummingbird Wars

Do you have a hummingbird feeder outside one of your windows? Then you know what I am talking about. We are delighted with the antics of these colorful little birds as they swoop around each other aiming for one of the feeders. If you spend some time observing a series of feeders, you will notice that there is some very peculiar behavior that occurs quite regularly. We call it the hummingbird wars and it is quite amusing to watch.

 

I can never understand how they know you just filled the feeders up. Pretty soon, more hummers arrive and as the numbers increase, there soon arrives what we call “the alpha hummer,” my husband used to call him Saddam. This bird, for some unknown reason, begins to demonstrate obnoxious behavior. He or she runs the other birds away from the feeders by dive-bombing them. You don’t want to sit too close to this maneuver because you could become part of the assault. As this bird ducks and dives around the others, the rest move back and forth from the feeders, trying to catch a quick sip before being driven off again. This goes on for quite a while until most of the “undesirable” birds are driven away. The aggressor then sits alone at the feeder and drinks to his heart’s content until he’s ready to fly away. The solution to this bad behavior is to set up more feeders. As he chased birds away from one feeder, others moved in on the remaining feeders.  Eventually, the dismissed hummers return and everything is peaceful until the “alpha hummer” comes back and the scenario repeats itself. It’s nature’s way of entertaining you. We really enjoy it.

 

 

Brown-outs

I heard today that Los Angeles is having trouble providing enough electricity for its residents again because of the high heat this week. I can’t begin to understand why government officials have been so cowed by the so-called “environmental community” that California hasn’t built any electrical generating plants for almost 30 years. What were they thinking? Did they think people would go along indefinitely with not having adequate power as populations continue to soar? Does this make any sense to you?

 

It seems to me that politicians these days no longer have the capability to make decisions of any kind because they are so beholden to the contributors of their re-elections that they have forgotten the reason they have been voted into office in the first place. They have become so removed from their real constituents that they don’t realize that the people who voted them in can easily replace them. I’m not too sure that even the voters realize that the power of the ballot box is in their hands, not somebody else’s.

 

So what can we do to change this situation? How do we get politicians to be responsive to our needs and not those of their special interest groups? Is it even possible to change this treadmill we seem to be on, constantly changing one unresponsive agenda-driven politico for another? I have to believe that it is possible but it will take some strong-willed people to push, and I mean push hard, to change the direction we are headed in.

 

There are too many issues facing us in the Valley such as the Community Plan, the Santa Ynez Airport expansion, and the Uniform Rules just to mention a few that are going to be decided in the coming months that could forever change the look of our Valley if we are not careful. There are forces here that do not care about agriculture and only see those fields as places to develop. There are those among us who if they could, would freeze time, making it impossible for us to thrive and grow but rather force us to be stagnant until we shrivel and die. There are powerful people who see this Valley as a tourist magnet, where they can make phony ranch visits a thing to do, flight seeing and wagon rides, where they can exploit the real nature of the Valley and its beauty for their economic advantage.

 

We all need to be vigilant in the coming months to identify those who would change us to their liking, who would put inappropriate designations on agricultural land in the hope that they could someday develop it into some money-making venture for themselves. Together we can keep our Valley the way we would like it but it won’t be easy. These schemers will do almost anything to fool us into thinking they are doing what is best for us, but we know better what we want. It will be an uphill battle but we will prevail. Keep in touch so we can work together to identify those who would jeopardize our future.